perspective

I'm starting to think that if I hear "Rocking around the Christmas Tree" one more time, I'll barf. Don't get me wrong. Typically, I love Christmas music. For some reason though, this year is just... different. I think it might be the first time I haven't gotten sucked into Commercial Christmas, even in the slightest really. Okay, I put up decorations and drank eggnog, but I'm pretty sure my grand total amount of time spent Christmas shopping (aside from trying to track down one gift in particular- AHEM) was like three hours. I went to the mall once, because we had to, and it was sort of miserable. Full of miserable-looking people spending money they don't have to please people they don't really like. Made me feel icky. 

Our marriage thus far has been in exercise in contentment, for sure. I realized the other day that I hadn't bought any new clothes or shoes or anything in months.... and I was totally fine with it. I didn't have cable... and that was cool too. Couldn't even eat out more than once or twice a week.... and that one was a little harder, but still.... I lived to tell about it. I'm not trying to toot my horn or anything, other than to admit that in the past, I've let materialism run rampant in my life, and I'm recovering with extensive help from God. Honestly, I feel so much more free. And happy. Not burdened so much by things. Or appearances. I haven't dyed my hair in forever. I don't wear as much makeup as I used to. Deciding what to wear is not a process anymore. Well, at least the process now is more like- "Which shirt on the floor looks cleanest and has the fewest wrinkles?" Ha, this is starting to sound like the whole cliche "letting myself go" after getting married thing. Maybe I am. Not in THAT way... but maybe I am letting more of myself go, to God, little by little, day by day. Anyway, I feel like I'm going off on a tangent I had no intention of addressing. Yeah, I know. You're not surprised. 

I guess letting go has freed up a lot of time to think about things. I've found myself reading more, and creating more. Taking control over my depression. Not allowing it to paralyze me with self-pity and loathing. 

And so, this holiday season, things have begun to look a lot different than they have in years past.

One word that I can't get out of my mind and heart is perspective. I've heard some absolutely brilliant and moving songs that take on the perspective of different people involved in the birth of Jesus in the lowliest of circumstances, from the shepherds to the wise men to Mary and Joseph to baby Jesus Himself. It's fascinating to me, to think deeply about what it must have been like for those who actually witnessed the event that changed- and fulfilled- history. And so I had to share them. (I didn't actually post the lyrics to "Do You Hear What I Hear?" because most of us know them already, but I added Copeland's version to the playlist because it will forever change the way you listen to that song.) Typically I'm not a fan of contemporary Christian music, but no lie, they have a total monopoly over Christmas music. Hands down. They actually think of other ways to sing about Jesus's birth besides covering "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" for the MILLIONTH time. So here you go. I hope you get as much out of these as I have these past few weeks.

"How Many Kings," Downhere

Follow the star to a place unexpected

Would you believe after all we've projected 

A child in a manger

Lowly and small, the weakest of all

Unlikeliest hero, wrapped in his mother's shawl

Just a child

Is this who we've waited for?

'Cause how many kings stepped down from their thrones?

How many lords have abandoned their homes?

How many greats have become the least for me?

And how many gods have poured out their hearts

to romance a world that is torn all apart?

How many fathers gave up their sons for me?

Only one did that for me.

Bringing our gifts for the newborn savior

All that we have, whether costly or meek

Because we believe

Gold for his honor and frankincense for his pleasure

And myrrh for the cross he'll suffer

Do you believe, is this who we've waited for?

This is who we've waited for.

"I Celebrate the Day," Relient K

And with this Christmas wish is missed

The point I could convey

If only I could find the words to say to let You know how much You've touched my life

Because here is where You're finding me, in the exact same place as New Year's Eve

And from a lack of my persistency

We're less than half as close as I want to be

And the first time that You opened Your eyes

Did you realize that You would be my Savior?

And the first breath that left your lips

Did you know that it would change this world forever?

And so this Christmas I'll compare

The things I've felt in prior years

To what this midnight made so clear

That You have come to meet me here

To look back and think that

This baby would one day save me

In the hope that You did

That You were born so I might really live

To look back and think that

This baby would one day save me

And I celebrate the day that You were born to die

So I might one day pray for you to save my life.

"Mary Did You Know," Mark Lowry

Mary did you know that your baby boy will one day walk on water?

Did you know that your baby boy will save our sons and daughters?

Did you know that your baby boy has come to make you new?

This child that you've delivered will soon deliver you

Mary did you know that your baby boy will give sight to a blind man?

Did you know that your baby boy will calm the storm with his hand?

Did you know that your baby boy has walked where angels trod?

When you kiss your little baby, you kiss the face of God

The blind will see, the deaf will hear

And the dead will live again

The lame will leap, the dumb will speak

The praises of the lamb

Mary did you know that your baby boy is Lord of all creation?

Did you know that your baby boy will one day rule the nation?

Did you know that your baby boy is heaven's perfect lamb?

This sleeping child you're holding is the Great I AM.

"Joseph's Lullaby," Mercyme

Go to sleep, my son

This manger for your bed

You have a long road before You

Rest your little head

Can you feel the weight of your glory?

Do you understand the price?

Does the Father guard your heart for now

So you can sleep tonight?

Go to sleep my son

Go and chase your dreams

This world can wait for one more moment

Go and sleep in peace

I believe the glory of heaven is lying in my arms tonight

Lord, I ask that He just for this moment simply be my child

Go to sleep my son

Baby, close your eyes

Soon enough you'll save the day

But for now, dear Child of Mine

Oh, my Jesus, sleep tight

I mean, WOW. It's really so easy to forget how miraculous the birth of Christ was. And how very.... bizarre. I guess if we make it sound all cutesy with little kids singing "Away in a Manger" it's an easy pill to swallow. But are we listening to ourselves sing these familiar songs year after year? Do we really believe what they say anymore, or do they just make for pleasant background noise at our family gatherings?

It's Jesus's freakin' birthday, people, and all we do is give EACH OTHER presents. As if any of us deserve anything. Let us bring HIM silver and gold. 

Take some time to gain a little perspective the next few days.